New

" Let's stop crying over the 'should have been', move on... your blessings are melting."

New chapter begins; it's not easy as there are a lot of things, people who I have left.

    I left them because it's necessary, it's for my growth; This is the only time I became selfish for myself. I felt bad for making this kind of decision but I know, I need to learn how to stand on my own two feet; I too know to myself that there are a lot of things I need to fix (my behavior and attitude towards someone whom I dearly love (before)), my principles, my career, my relationship with God and myself.

        When I realized that I am compromising my worth, I stop manipulating myself to believe that it's okay to settle for less, because the truth is... its not okay; definitely. I realize my worth after enduring the same cycle. 

after leaving the past behind me, I have soooooo many realizations that if I write it on a single piece of paper, it would not be enough; it's not easy because even the anger disappeared, the pain is still there.

Sunday Mass when someone told us this phrase: " Let's stop crying over the 'should have been', move on... your blessings are melting."

It's really not easy, especially when you are tempted to look back. Strength is always needed in this situation. You need God, you need someone who you can talk to; many times when God always made me realize that keep on walking, even though it's hard and you want to go back to the past (person and memories) you shouldn't.

        It's hard because you are new to your present chpater, who said that it would be easy? 

For those are with me at the moment, don't stop walking; I actually can't understand why all of these should happen; I want to know my end game; but God is not like that. I prayed for growth ofc, I should learn how to endure (within this process of becoming a successful and better person). Step by step, God is helping me to realize what are the things I should learn, especially now that I am already an adult (young); I didn't know that transition from teenager to young adult would be easy hahah.

        Pain is necessary for growth as they say, learn to endure it. I may not understand everything, I know and is always hoping; God always have my back. Surrendering to God needs a lot of courage and obedience. But once you surrender to him,  there is no turning back. It's not easy to let go of the things you once dearly treasure and loved. But when you want to grow, you need to learn how to let go of the things that are already unecessary. ~